What a torturous trip

Finally! I'm home!

The 8 days trip kinda sucks..other than the shopping part and sightseeing part of cos...haha...but shopping, half of the things I buy are meant for other people, so I am damn broke now...lol..owe money quick pay money!

Went to Lucas films in San Francisco! My friend's friend is working there, so he brought us around the place..if not it is not opened to public, meaning only their staff can bring outsiders in...so I am very lucky..
We passed by the Transformers team, but of cos we can't meet them or go into the office cos the information is confidential...

Too bad I can't post any photos online, not allowed, if you wanna see I can show you, inside my camera..hehe..

The environment outside the office is very scenic...got park, lake (with ducks swimming inside somemore), Star Bucks coffee, and the offices don't look like offices from outside at all...those pics I can post...

Wait till I upload the pics...haha...

Spent a lot in SFO and Korea man...like S$400+?! Bought a lot of clothes from Forever 21, weird, I don't even shop in SG's F21...and bought a pair of Levis jeans, some cosmetics stuff, hand cream, masks, mascara and all...buay tahan myself!

I shall not complain about work, spoil mood nia..haha...
And I had Royston Tan on my flight from Korea to Singapore! My colleague said surprisingly..big director sits in Economy class..haha..

That time from Beijing back to Sg, I also had ex-actor Qin Wei on my flight as well..and according to my friend, he is as hao4 se4 as usual..the way he looks at gals is just..se4...haha..

Oh and Qinghui, to answer ur qn..touch screen is just..different lor, u need to get used to it...after some time I think basic phone is still betta...easier..haha..or perhaps cos Omnia is more complicated that's why...

Random stuff again..just to have some updates..haha

My blog is stagnant again...basically there's nothing much to update...oh ya...there are..

My little niece is born! On 28th April 2009...seems like she waited for me to come back from Dubai before she's willing to "pop out"...LOL

More pics next time..didn't take much pics actually, cos I was more focussed and concerned about her Chinese name.

She's officially called Cheyenne Tan Yan Xin (I think should be like that ba..) 陈妍心

意思是希望她能有个美丽、聪慧的心。是我取的！

Not exactly...her eight characters was given to fortune teller, where by they calculate her name, and came out with a few characters...but due to the limitation of the number of strokes, there are not many words, so no matter how we put the words together, the names either sounded very common or just simply, NOT NICE.

姝文、姿允、施匀 etc...or whatever other ways you put them together, just don't sound right...

妍心...haha..is one of the nicer ones..sweet and nice... hee...

I got a new phone for myself too..Samsung Omnia...really loved touch screen phone at first...but now I understand why some friends perfer basic phones ultimately...

I don't regret buying it so far..but I guess, in the end, I will go back to using a basic phone..haha..

Going to Korea and San Francisco...must take care of myself and hygiene!

Spiderman spotted in NUS?!

NUS Central Library got Spiderman?!

Haha...I'm in Dubai now...OMG...news really travel fast. It happened on 23 April 2009 1.30am, when the NUS muggers are STILL studying in school at freaking 1.30am...

And here I am in Dubai, watching such a video! LOL...

I wonder who is so bo liao...But I thumbs up to him man, entertaining the muggers' sian studying life...he's good! haha..

Joyce, maybe you can write this on OMY le!

No chance to do desert tour in Dubai this time, cos too expensive le..other people said it should be about S$50, but when we asked the Concierge, it was more than S$100! Hmm..also there's only myself and another girl, so we decided not to go le...

But nevermind..I ice-skated with other friends and my batch-boy though! At the world's largest mall, The Dubai Mall..

It is so huge that it takes you like 30min to walk from one end to the other on ONE level. There are like 4 levels or 5 levels...enough liao...but more high-end shops, doesn't appeal to me much...so never buy anything for myelf..wahaha..spent a lot on food though, cos the food is quite expensive...luckily got bring dry stores (aka 干粮..wahaha!

Can't wait to see my little niece! :D

My 2nd brother's child is coming to this world very very soon, but the sian thing is, I would not be around to witness her coming into this world. I wonder how she's going to look like, and what her cute name would be. But I know this little girl is going to be very sweet and cute! Hehe... I've told my brother to contact me when she's born, no matter where I am, I must not miss the special day! :D

Anyway, I'll be going to Dubai tonight, and going to Istanbul on Saturday morning...
Pray hard whoever I meet is nice..haha..ok...I must not have 分别心...no matter good or bad, I should not judge in the first place... :)

Most importantly, I must do my job well and then enjoy myself on my off days...
Appreciate the world around me, and share the happiness with the people around...

Pic of a little dog we saw in Amsterdam's tulip garden...he's called Elmo! The old lady at the back is his owner... :)




Haha! When I'm "drunk"...I get high...just 3 small glasses of Heineken and I go crazy.. Super Tak Glam!!



One of my fave pics takenin Amsterdam! :D



Myself, Fay and Naomi...who shares the same birthday as me but 1 year younger!




Trust me, this mule walked towards me..very very closely, like he's going to eat me up anytime...I don't know why! So I backed off a bit, but decided to embrace the animal and take a pic with it! LOL..




My cousin in Amsterdam! :D

Back from Amsterdam

Haha..lazy to post pics here for now..maybe it's better to just see the pics in facebook, which I am going to post some time later also...

Quite busy after coming back...on the same night after the flight, it was meeting my colleagues again for dinner and drinks...haha..yes...see them again after the flight...because they are so fun and nice to be with! :) Went for dinner at the Firestation, then to Wala Wala Holland V for drinks, then to Sentosa Siloso beach for a chit-chat chillout session...by sitting on the beach...so damn fun...even though in the end I reached home at 5am in the morning...!!! Haha!

Anyway, very soon...tonight, I went for another "联谊" session organised by Diane..and it's Japanese guys this time..LOL...
2 of them..not bad looking..
But according to Diane, in the end, one of them is actually attached..the other one, also not bad, but a bit too quiet, and he's 33 years old...hmm...a bit old lah..my 2nd brother's age wor..but he knows Chinese...

Hmm..sometimes really feel I don't have enough time for myself in SG...keep going out...simply treating my house like hotel in Singapore also..my parents din say that but I feel that way..
come home from work, sleep, go out...come back sleep, next day morning go out again...not only I din see my family much...I feel exhausted also...too packed with activities...I'm really tired sometimes...

So if sometimes I said I wanna stay home...It's not I don't wanna meet up, but I really need more time to be at home...to be with my family, or at least stay in my room and be in my own little world...

To be continued...

In Copenhagen now

Wah kao! It's damn cold here! The moment we arrived at the hotel, it's feezing cold! I think so far it's the coldest place I've ever encountered..

And we saw snow! Not on the floor lah, but when we arrived in the morning there was light snow! Haha...and my friend said it looked like dandruff flying around...OMG...what a description, come to think about it, YUCKS... LOL

Feels like just hibernate in the room cos it is simply too cold to go out. I think it's about 2 degrees celcius or so? Brrrrr...

Cold till all of us wanna curse and swear...even myself....haha..

Later going out for dinner with my friends..hope we get nice food! :)

More updates...

Haha...I'm back!

Took 2 days MC so I'm very free now. Mon rested, Tue and Wed MC, Thur off, Fri then work. SHIOK!

Shiok 个屁！

I sprained my back at work, and according to the Chinese sinseh, I bathed late at night also, so 湿气 (damp air) entered my body and caused my back to hurt... usual same old problem that I kena in uni lah...well..MC!

Still hurt a little, but much better le...perhaps I gotta wayang a bit at work...look at customers with a pathetic face and act weak, so I no need to help them with their luggage..LOL 偷懒!

Slack at home these 2 days, and it feels damn shiok and energetic to have enough rest and sleep...haha!

Ok I can feel angry eyes staring at me liao...I have times when I don't have enough sleep also mah...then still must work for more than 12 hours..

Talking about my back treatment process. It was torturous, yet shiok... machiam everything is shiok to me...haha...

I did acupuncture, 推拿和拔罐...TOGETHER in one day...
One drop of tear rolled down my eye...haha
I wanna scream in pain, but in the end I grabbed the pillow and bedside and screamed in silence...

DAMN PAIN LAH! 痛死我了！

But really felt much better after that...

And you are right Diane, many of our dear friends don't blog already, I think they are too busy, such that blogging is the last thing in their mind to do...I will be like that as well if I am busy with other stuff too...haha...bo bian...

Updates...

Finally got time to update more about my life...if not I think my readers/stalkers are going to disappear soon...LOL

Went to New Delhi (India) last Monday, and came back on Thursday. I thought I will be rotting in my room for 3 days, luckily some of my colleagues want to go out, so we managed to go to some flea market places and Taj Mahal! :D

First day of arrival we went to a shopping area called Priyas Complex...something like that, I'm not sure if I've spelt wrongly or what...

There is a cinema, a few eateries/restaurants, pub, bookshops, MacDonalds etc...but don't look like a complex at all...9 of us went together, and we split into 3 different "toot toots". haha.











Oh, and there's a cow walking around at the area..."hey my buddy!"...haha...so cute...and it just walked around nonchalantly...got attitude... :)



Then we went to another flea market place called Janpath...
There sells a lot of Punjabi suits, more of "Indian wear", books, usual clothes we wear like T-shirts, handbags, table cloth etc...many many things...and I feel that the people there, are not very friendly..

The vendors are very "hiong"..(fierce)..haha! But when you are more fierce than them, they wont disturb you anymore..

Vendor: "Hey Madam, come come!!"

I walked away, ignoring the person.

Vendor: "Hello! Hello!!!!"

Me: "NO THANK YOU!!!! (shouting out load)

Vendor: "Ok thank you madam! Welcome to India!" *Smile*

Me: Stunned....

Anyway, the books there are damn cheap. Ok really pretty cheap..

I bought these books, for less than S$60... each story book is about S$7 on average...cheap hor!



The next day we went to visit the Taj Mahal at Agra, 4 hours bus ride from Delhi.

Other than Taj, we also visited the Agra Fort and the palace area, where the family (家族) of the Taj Mahal stayed...(I forgot the surname of the Kings, :S)

















On the 11th March, it's the Holi festival of the Hindus..where the people will pour powder and water over you etc, make you very colourful...we avoided that day because we do not want to be "coloured", haha..no lah, we thought it will be very messy and chaotic, especially for girls, it can be quite dangerous...

The kids drew on the floor, including the word "HAPPY". Can imagine how happy they get... :)















Taj Mahal with my colleagues...(above)

I have not watched Slumdog Millionaire. But according to my colleagues who did, they said the scene is really very "slumdog"...the kids begging us for money...when we saw the bottle caps on the water bottles they gave us, we will be thinking if it has been glued...LOL...very funny...

Very exotic experience...

The sky is ALWAYS clear, with no or few clouds, so what we see is blue sky, green patches of grass, yellow muddy grounds/floors, black people, white people, yellow people (like us) and so on...what an interesting colour-combination.

But seriously, looking at the living conditions of the people there, we Singaporeans really should cherish what we have...our living conditions are like HEAVEN to them...

Culture shock.

In love with new songs again

This time...it's Jason Mraz!

He just came to Singapore for his live concert on Thursday...I did not go...but I'm in love with the 2 songs that's playing on my blog now! :D

Sometimes, I see the ang mohs wear till very slack, going around the world to backpack (it rhymes! LOL) I feel like joining them!! Hope I get to backpack one day..anywhere is fine, as long as I have friends with me.. :)

Loh Wei! I wanna join you for the Mexico trip! Seems so fun...too bad you're back in Toronto liao...haha...

I will be going to India-New Delhi tonight...too bad not a backpacking trip...haha...just hope I don't have spider webs growing around me..lol..if I don't get to go out..I have to rot in the room for 3 days! Time to exercise!

I've been told to slim down

Yes I'm fat...I've been told to slim down because my uniform cannot fit me well anymore. They even told me it looks like my skirt is going to burst soon...
And I was told I gotta do something about my hair, it can look unkempt. Yes "unkempt" was used. Even my watch also 被嫌弃, because the face is light pink, which is not allowed actually...

SIAN.

How motivating. How nice to hear those words. Perhaps I should start eating bread and instant noodles especially when I'm overseas, just like those people who tried to do that in order to save lots of money. In that case I can save up a lot too. :)

Ya I am fatter. SIAN. I thought building muscles could help me work better. Yes I'm not wrong, but I thought I got exercise so perhaps I eat more, and eat much richer food, and I become FAT!

And my hair! Should I maintain a short hairstyle for the rest of my working life in this line? I really wished to have long hair yet I look so ugly tying my hair up. Even my friend asked me not to leave long hair. And not to mention that I don't really look good in my short hair either, after using the spray to make it "helmet-like". *Hmpf*

I wonder if I suit this job. It took me months for me to accept the fact that I'm in this line actually. And you know what? Sometimes I have the idea that, if the economy is so bad that the company has to ask people to leave, I don't think I would feel upset about it if I were to become one of them. Yet, there are times that I thought to myself, I would not mind working for more than 2 years...

I really don't know what I want. I cried at night sometimes, panicking over what I should do after I quit the job next time. I panicked because I still do not know what I want. Even though I still have time to think about it. Perhaps I just worry too much. I just want to be simple and happy. But I also want my family to be happy. The money I earn now is good for my parents to live more comfortably...my mother kept telling me to just go ahead and do what I wanna do next time, don't worry about money..but how not to? I also have to save up, for marriage and house and retirement...as well as for my parents' retirement...it's not that they don't have money but I'm afraid it's not enough...after I quit I have to go back to entry level..come on, don't tell me to be sales person, property agent or what...it's not that I look down on these jobs, but I'm totally not interested in them..

OK enough of sudden rambling..didn't intend to talk so much wan...guess I will become a fat, grumpy and naggy old woman next time..LOL

But I don't want! I wanna age gracefully and be a 气质与智慧兼具的老女人！

A Message by George Carlin (a comedian)

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways , but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

George Carlin

This is interesting..and it is so true..take some time to think about it, digest it..and hopefully, slow down our pace and love again.. :)

On leave!

Yeah! I'm on leave from 3rd Feb till 13th Feb...a total of 10 days!

So far I'm enjoying it, meeting up with friends, catching up with them, and making new friends during the “联谊”session on Friday evening..haha...

I even went back for choir and learn a few new songs... I thought if there is any Japanese or Spanish customers talk to me, and I don't understand them, I can start singing "Yuki ga Tokeru" or "No Importa La Distancia" to them...LOL...ok lame..

I still have a few days before I go back to work! But somehow, as a typical Singaporean, the kiasu part of me is starting to worry...or rather, dread the feeling of going back to work...I DON'T WANT MY LEAVE TO END!!!

But it's not that bad lah..cos once i arrive in Paris, I can meet my JC friend Kenneth! He is over there for an exchange programme..what a coincidence..such a faraway place and I can meet a friend just because we are both there at the same time.. Too bad I don't get to go Toronto, if not I may get a chance to meet up with Loh Wei as well..nvm lah, like what you said, meet up when you come back in May!

Haiyo..time flies lor...which is also good, this may not be a very good year, so, 快快过去！ :P

Random pics

《生活与生存》










Happily singing KTV...hehe...




Taken in Barcelona...

100 种生活

作詞:鍾成虎
作曲:盧廣仲

整個世界 停止 不轉動 很寂寞
走在海邊 數著 螢火蟲 好困惑
想要的生活怎麼有一百種
不想掉進這深深 漩渦

整個海洋 擺動 柔軟地 舉起我
孤獨給我 自由 猶豫得 好感動
想要的生活怎麼有一百種
該怎麼走 誰來告訴我 wow

每當我背對星空
抱著地球
發現自己其實脆弱 不敢說
當我背對星空
孤獨摸索
愛情漸漸萎縮 我猜不透
無邊的宇宙 哪裡有我要的生活

整個海洋 擺動 柔軟地 舉起我
轉載來自 ※Mojim.com　魔鏡歌詞網
孤獨給我 自由 猶豫得 好感動
想要的生活怎麼有一百種
該怎麼走 誰來告訴我 wow

每當我背對星空
抱著地球
發現自己其實脆弱 不敢說
當我背對星空
孤獨摸索
愛情漸漸萎縮 我猜不透
無邊的宇宙 哪裡有我(想)要的生活

每當我背對星空
抱著地球
發現自己其實脆弱 不敢說
當我背對星空
孤獨摸索
愛情漸漸萎縮 我猜不透
無邊的宇宙 哪裡有我要的生活
原來一百分之一

I really like this song. It's a very nice song to chill with. Comfortable. :)

《生活与生存》

昨晚与几个朋友看了由张艾嘉、郑元畅和王耀庆祝演得一场舞台剧《华丽上班族之生活与生存》。长达3 个小时的戏“延长”至4个小时，而可怜的演员们便从8时演至12时，之间张艾嘉和王耀庆还得重演其中的一场戏，接吻了两次。观众也连续“中场休息”了3次，我想，加起来大家也休息了1个钟头，哈哈！“榴莲壳”的人员只好提供免费的饮料和酒来赔偿我们这些无辜的观众。

无辜，真的好无辜，我无辜地多付了25元搭taxi回家…… :S

好drama的一场舞台剧哦。

舞台剧本身也很drama。

挺不错的，张艾嘉也演得很好。郑元畅在刚刚出场时显得有些不自然，不过到后来他慢慢入了戏，只是中间说台词的时候还是有不小心出错，吃了一些螺丝……

更drama的是，我被activated for work on the next day...which is today...and I have to cancel my dinner appointment with my friends! :(

这场戏很直接地表达了现代人工作时的情景，人吃人、勾心斗角、然后到最后伤害了人，才发现大家一直在争取的名和利根本都是空的，换来的只有压力、伤害，然后还有难过和后悔，中间没有快乐，没有发自内心的真正的快乐。

满沉重的一部戏，不过中间穿插了一些好笑的剧情，所以还不至于那么“重”。可是，作了4个钟头，大家都患了由Joyce 讲的 Economy Class Syndrome...

刚从柏斯回来的我，也在工作时看到了drama……我可怜的同事被上司骂得哭了起来，我也看到了上司那凶恶的嘴脸，完全毫不留情的怒骂……很恐怖、很惊心动魄……在我同事哭泣的那霎那间，我也很想和她一起哭，可是，没办法，还是得工作。她也很坚强，去了厕所一趟出来后，她若无其事的看着我，对我微笑、对乘客微笑……

可是从她的眼神里，我看到了不甘心……Haiz...

为了在这样的社会里生活与生存，大家要坚强啊！

Talk about some trips

Recently I had been to Japan and Beijing, and I would like to share some things that I had seen overseas which are interesting, but may not be new to you all..

I arrived in Japan on New Year day, and they have a tradition of inviting guests to drink Sake on New Year. Thus I had my first experience of drinking Sake, in Japan somemore! I was very excited about it actually, hehe. The hotel offered us one cup of Sake each when we arrived. It somehow tasted like Vodka, but it was less pungent (I think) and very smooth to drink.

Conclusion: It was quite nice, and it should taste better if it was hot. :)





The "mountain" of Sake cups at the hotel.








The Japanese are a very civilised group of people (let's not mention about history here..). Just like the local Taoists who would go to the temples to pray for good luck and good fortune in the year ahead, the Japanese also flock to their temples during New Year to pray. And they are very very "guai"...they queue up to go into the temple! Some of the queues are even in single-file...goodness...I don't think we will ever see that in Singapore anytime soon..




But this is a picture of the crowd squeezing to queue before they reached the temple.











Then on New Year day, the group of us had a gathering at the hotel for New Year dinner, as organised by the company. So for the whole night we ate, drank and watched TV...
























Oh next is Beijing...went there with my "training classmate"..was super happy and excited about the flight..cos I do not need to work as much, and it's my first time to Beijing! Too bad, due to time constraints and weather restrictions, I do not have the chance to sightsee over there...
I shall wait for summer, or when the weather is not as cold...and I will brave my way to The Forbidden City, and Tiananmen Square! Wait for me! :D

Happy New Year!

Ok ya this post lagged for like...FIVE days...haha! But never mind lah, who cares? It's just another day and year, but remember to change your dates to 2009 instead of 2008, that's all...

New Year resolutions ah, I don't have the habit of doing that...I always don't plan, no organisation, no planning, no goals etc...
I am a very "impromptu" person...haha...that's why, I'm also messy and "anyhow"...

Well, one of my goals that I want or hope to accomplish, is to learn and pass my driving...it's kind of a dream of mine to know how to drive since young, but because of financial constraints, I was not able to fulfil this little dream until now, when I have a job, and I can finally save up some money to learn driving... :)

And one little secret...

Everytime when my Dad or brothers are on the road, if they met some kayu drivers, they will say that the driver must be a lady...and almost 100% of the times, they are true...
So, my wish of wanting to drive is also, in a way, a desire to prove them wrong...that not all female drivers are kayu...
I'm kinda 大女人 in this sense..always 不服气 when guys think in a certain way...about ladies...

Another good example is our sense of direction...recently met a colleague...he asked a lady for directions, and she seemed to be unsure about the area...so he feels that females' sense of direction is very bad...which is what he has experienced before...
I told him jokingly that there's a female here (referring to myself), so don't say this kind of things in front of me because it's kinda rude...then he said, "then you lead the way lor!"
I kept quiet..cos I don't know what to say...I admit my sense of direction is not very good, but it's not that bad...just that I need more time to read the map, get my bearings right before I can get the correct direction...but if all the while I know where I am going, I will be able to get to the destination...

Well...I just feel kinda 不服气 when he said that..haha..yet I feel useless that I was not able to prove myself right...真是不争气！
Next time I shall jiayou! So guys, stop looking down at females ok!

Got one colleague said I not bad cos I was the one who brought him to take the correct trains in Paris ok... but he took me around Paris lah.. haha..




Night view opposite the hotel

Copenhagen

Hey all! I'm in Copenhagen now..internet is free in this hotel, so shiok ah...I can use internet the whole day...hee..

This is a very special Christmas for me. Although everywhere is closed here, I had my share of fun and nice memories... :)

Only regret: I did not get to see a white Christmas...but the weather is damn cold... -2 degree Celcius! Freezing man...
But cold on the outside, warm in the heart.. :)

I will be going back to Singapore in a few hours' time! It's 7.07am here now, 1020am the plane will take off for Singapore...

Home sweet home! Yay! :D

Anyway, this is dedicated to Naimin: Happy Birtday to you! I know it's 27th, not 28th yet, but here's a greeting from me in advance! Cya tomorrow! :D

Merry Christmas everyone!

Merry Christmas to all! Ok, I know there's another 2 days before Christmas, but I will be working so this is an early greetings to all of you! :P

I am getting more used to being alone..in fact, I like being alone! Especially when I go out overseas, shop alone, eat alone, walk alone, drink coffee alone...
Ok, probably that's a sign of me becoming anti-social..what an irony, my job making me more anti-social...LOL...

Well...being the straightforward me...说话总是口无遮拦...my bad...always say things without thinking twice...and worse is that I say things that hurt others...happily!
So ends up it seems as if I'm proud and talking down to people...especially friends that I love.. :(
Sometimes I even make jokes at the expense of others' pride..and it can be hurtful, no matter how unintentional I want to be..

Sometimes I wish my mouth can only sing, and that's all..
But I guess that's not going to be the way I grow to be a better person..I have to learn how to speak and listen wisely...talk only when necessary..if I can't joke, then I might as well just remain a boring person as I am now..sometimes try too hard will get negative results...WORSE!

To the people whom I have hurt by my words or actions, I apologise! :)
I am really sorry to have said things that will be better off left unsaid...but I know that the damge has been done. I don't know if any of you will read this, but I have no intention of putting you down when I said certain things. I just lack the wisdom of phrasing my words properly before they come out of my mouth. In the end, they hurt.

Anyway, nowadays I can't even catch my colleagues' jokes..especially the guys'..their jokes are simply too chim for me to understand, or we are just of very different frequency...oh well...as long as they are happy and don't tekan me can le..I just wanna work my share and get my money...haha..

矛盾的心情

很久没有用中文写部落格了。

我是个很容易emo的人，一点点小事就会不开心，或是想很多事，而且是往比较负面的方面想。可是我不喜欢这样的自己，觉得人生就只有几十年，做人应该要看得开，能有多开心就有多开心。人生应该是充满欢笑的，不是多愁善感。至少，我不喜欢这样。

偏偏，我就是这样。我不要！我要做一个开开心心，很会开玩笑，事事都能从容应对的人。

可是到最后，我还是会作回我自己。哈哈！

最近这几个月发生很多事情，我步入人生的另一段旅程、刚开始的恋情一下子就结束、父亲生病动手术等等。每一次好不容易平复的心情又再一次地被波动。

很累。


孤独。


不安。


难过。


哭不出来的心痛。


还要强颜欢笑。
一边阻止眼泪流下，一边微笑工作的时候真的很难熬。


没关系，这些不愉快的日子很快会过去。

我期待美好明天的到来。

:)